choosing an app
There is no best dating app. There’s the one that fixes your problem.
We make a dating app, so treat this accordingly. But the useful question isn't which app is best — it's what went wrong on the last one, because that determines what to look for.
Start with what actually went wrong
“Best dating app” is close to an unanswerable question, because the apps fail people in different ways and you only care about the way yours failed. Work backwards from that instead. Almost every complaint we’ve heard sorts into four buckets, and each points at a different feature to look for.
“I couldn’t tell who was real”
You want mandatory verification, not an optional badge. The distinction matters more than it sounds: when verification is optional, the accounts that skip it are precisely the ones running stolen photos. A badge system sorts honest users into two groups and leaves the dishonest ones untouched. Ask whether unverified profiles can appear at all. More on how verification works →
“I was swiping for hours and getting nowhere”
You want a capped deck — and specifically one that paying does not uncap. If the daily limit disappears with a subscription, the limit was never a design principle, it was a toll booth. A real cap costs the company engagement metrics, which is why so few apps have one. More on why endless decks exist →
“We wanted completely different things”
You want apps where intent is stated on the profile and visible before you match, rather than something you negotiate at date three. This is the least dramatic of the four failures and by some distance the most common — nobody misled anybody, the information simply wasn’t available in time. More on stated intent →
“There was nobody near me”
This one is the reason we tell people to stay where they are. Density beats features every single time — an app with excellent design and nobody within forty kilometres is worse than a mediocre app everyone in your city uses. If this was your problem, pick the biggest app where you live and ignore everything else on this page.
It’s also, candidly, Ember’s current weakness. We open city by city, so outside those cities the larger apps genuinely serve you better today.
Where Ember fits
Ember is built for the first three problems: verification is mandatory, the daily deck is capped and Premium doesn’t extend it, and everyone states what they’re looking for. If your complaint was the fourth one, we’re probably not your answer yet.
That’s a narrower pitch than “the best dating app”, and it’s the honest one.
Common questions
What is the best dating app?
There isn't a single answer, and anyone giving you one is selling something. The best app for you depends on what made the last one not work — too many fake profiles, too much swiping, mismatched intentions, or simply nobody nearby. Diagnose that first, then pick.
What is the best dating app for serious relationships?
Look for two things: apps where people state what they're looking for on their profile, and apps that limit how many people you see. Both push toward considered choices rather than volume. Ember does both, and so do some others.
How do I avoid fake profiles on dating apps?
Prefer apps where verification is mandatory rather than an optional badge — optional verification is skipped by exactly the accounts you'd want it from. Beyond that: video call before meeting, meet in public, and treat any request for money as a scam, without exception.
Are paid dating apps better than free ones?
Not inherently. What matters is what the payment unlocks. If paying removes a limit the app invented purely to sell you the removal, that's a toll booth. If the core experience — matching and messaging — works without paying, the paid tier is an add-on rather than a gate.
Join the Ember waitlist
Free to join, and everyone on the waitlist gets 3 months of Ember Premium free when we open in their city.
Join the waitlist →